I remember the days, very vividly, when my four kids were all little. I was so busy with diaper changes, temper tantrums, cutting up food and picking up toys that I would wish for them to be older. I would wish that they could tie their own shoes, flush the toilet and clean up after themselves.
Don’t get me wrong! I’m happy that my kids are older and independent (to some extent). But I miss the constant mommy stuff I used to do 24/7.
I miss the snuggles when they were sick. I miss wrapping them in huge towels after their bath and smelling their clean hair. I miss them constantly needing my help. I miss combing their hair. Basically, I miss all those little things that used to WEAR ME OUT. But there’s something else I miss:
I miss NOT WORRYING all the time.
Oh, I worried back then about them learning their ABC’s, eating balanced meals and them using their manners. But now that I have three teenagers, I worry constantly!
I worry that when they pull out of my driveway, I won’t see them again.
I worry that when they go out with friends, they will make bad choices that will change their lives forever.
I worry that if they do get in trouble, I won’t be able to get them out of it.
I worry that I haven’t taught them enough “life lessons” to fully prepare them for this day and age.
I worry that social media will rob them of them being kids.
I worry about them making solid friendships.
I worry about where they will go to college and how to pay for it.
I worry that I haven’t been a good enough mom.
I worry about…everything!
I’ve heard moms who have kids older than mine say that this feeling never goes away. Not when they graduate from college. Not when they get married. Not when they have their own children.
Is this true? Will I worry about my kids the rest of my life? And will this worry keep me from enjoying them?
I’m sure these questions will be answered in time, but until I know for sure, I am going to keep doing the only thing I know how to do for them…
Even if I worry every second of every day.