Thank you to Martin Pringle Law Firm’s Divorce and Family Law Attorneys for sponsoring this post.
Kansas is a no-fault divorce state, meaning neither spouse has to be at “fault” in order to be granted a divorce and fault is not a factor in the division of marital assets. Even though it’s easier to be granted a divorce, filing for divorce is hardly ever an easy decision. It is full of unknowns and can be absolutely terrifying. Filing first though, has its benefits.
It Gives you the Opportunity to Plan
Sometimes, divorce comes out of nowhere like a hailstorm on a sunny day. But when you are the one who initiates and makes that hard choice, it gives you an opportunity to plan for what’s ahead—according to your terms. “People spend years planning their wedding, but they’re often too terrified (or too guilty) to spend ten minutes preparing for their divorce.” (unknown).
Thinking about what divorce would look like will help you build the courage (or decide not) to file for divorce. Think about what this would look like – who stays in the house during the divorce process? Financially, how will I swing this? What type of real estate or personal property will I be able to keep? When will I see my kids? What are the risks here, financially? Will I get custody of my children? What will my spouse’s reaction be? How will my kids react? After considering a magnitude of thoughts and coming up with your best “plan” and thinking of what that looks like, leads you to the next step—where do I file?
You Choose the Place
The venue, or place in which you file, can give you several options. Sometimes, spouses have been separated for some time and could even live in different states. If your spouse were to file in a different state than where your family lived, you may be forced to travel to that state for hearings and hire an attorney in that state. But even if you live in Sedgwick County and your spouse lives in Johnson County and were to file first, significant time and money can be spent traveling there for hearings. Filing first when your spouse does not live in the same zip code certainly can save time and expense. After choosing the place follows one of the biggest benefits of filing for divorce first, temporary orders.
Ability to Specify Temporary Orders
When you file your divorce petition, you will simultaneously file “temporary orders” with the court. This document communicates and brings your “plan” to life.
Temporary orders are just that, temporary, and are in effect until the divorce decree. However, your spouse can ask to modify these temporary orders. Included in the temporary orders are action items such as: granting temporary residential custody and visitation of children; orders for temporary spousal and child support; identifying who will remain in possession of the home; possession of any vehicles; orders for who is to pay what bills; among miscellaneous others depending on individual circumstances.
Most of the information included in the temporary orders is simply directing what you want to happen. Still, orders dealing with spousal and child support have to be supported by a Domestic Relations Affidavit. This is a document that must be completed and filed with the court. It contains information about the income and expenses of the parties. This document helps identify what temporary amount is generally appropriate to ask for when seeking spousal and child support.
After building up the courage, making the decision to file for divorce is the first step. And you are not alone. Nearly 40 – 50% of married couples divorce. After filing for divorce, keep in mind the best interests of your kids, and your own best interest. If you can balance those things – and everything else going on – then well, you are super mom! (and ready for anything that lies ahead).
Martin Pringle’s Divorce and Family Law Attorneys are experienced attorneys who have handled all aspects of divorce and family law matters including high conflict and high net worth divorces. Our attorneys advocate strongly for their divorce clients while striving to make the divorce process as non-contentious as possible. They work proactively to minimize conflict, and they seek to resolve the parties’ differences efficiently and economically.
