The further I get into this parenting thing, the more I think about my own childhood.
And the more I reminisce about it, the more I realize just how incredible it was growing up in a gem of a small town in the northeast corner of our state.
Maybe it’s because I, like many of us, remember my childhood with rose-colored glasses and reflect fondly on the lack of responsibility I had. Or maybe it’s because I listen to too many country songs that croon about idyllic small town life. Or maybe because that’s just partially the magic of childhood and partially the gift of time allowing us to remember mostly the good and letting those memories become really, really good.
But perhaps it’s because in a small town, you’ll find some of the hardest-working, humble, honest-to-goodness caring people that are all playing an active role in raising the next generation. Time really is slower, streets do seem safer, and at the core of all of that is this simple unspoken theme that centers the entire community: family first.
Back where I come from, people weren’t living to work, they were working to live.
Of course careers were taken seriously, and jobs were important. In fact, almost all of my friends had dual-working parents. But, people weren’t trying to climb over each other to advance in their careers, burning the midnight oil behind a desk. Parents did what they needed to in order to feel fulfilled and provide a good life for their kids, and then they packed up and spent time with the ones that mattered the most. Families ate dinner together every night, played catch in the yard, and went to church together on Sunday mornings.
Not one, but two Halloween parades existed…one in the afternoon so children walk down main street in costume with family and friends, and the other in the evening, and it originated over 100 years ago for the sole purpose of keeping kids out of trouble on Halloween night. The town shut down for the Homecoming parade and lined the streets to show support.
The local paper ran a special graduation section every year with each senior’s plans for the future. Crowds formed to watch prom-attendees walk in with their dates. People showed up to cheer at football games, basketball games, and volleyball games, even if their own kids weren’t playing.
There was a vested interest in the kids of our community, and we could feel them behind us. Of course at times that felt like our parents had spies on every corner – because essentially they did. If my parents didn’t know what I was up to, my friends’ parents did, and you can bet they called me out on it a time or two. (As much as small town people are known for their friendliness, they should also be known for their chatter.)
My husband and I followed jobs that led us away from our hometown, but we’re making an effort to raise our three babies in the same way our parents raised us.
Wichita is nearly 190 times bigger than the small town where we grew up. There was only one school system, so we got our education with the same group of kids from preschool through high school graduation. We know regardless of which school our kids end up at in Wichita, it’s just not possible to have the luxury of knowing everyone and their parents like our families did. But I’d imagine after sharing a few small town waves and getting involved where we settle in, we can start to mimic our upbringing as best we can…..just with a few more restaurants and stoplights this time around.
