I see you over there, back-to-school supplies. Yeah, yeah, I’ve caught a few commercials for back-to-school sales, too. Those “How to pack new and exciting lunches kids will actually eat” articles are clogging up my social media. It’s like the world is mocking me. Back-to-school? I don’t need it!
I have actually gotten pretty good at recognizing the commercials and changing the channel, spotting the displays in the stores and turning the other way, and just scrolling past all those helpful back-to-school articles. At my house, it’s still summer and all of that back-to-school nonsense is miles away. I’ve created a beautiful bubble of denial where I have resided since mid-June. I like it here where back-to-school does not exist. I find myself wishing for more 100 degree days. I tripped at Target last week because I refused to look directly at that display for crayons. Even my wall calendar is still turned to June. The price of denial is steep. But I am willing to pay it.
I do not wait with anticipation for the next season to roll around. This year, even the lure of my beloved apple chai, the drink that heralds the beginning of fall, has lost its shine. The promise of cooler nights, and more frequent s’mores, has no luster. Dare I say it but even a plan for new pumpkins does not set my heart alight. I am not waiting impatiently for the first sign of leaves to turn or marching band practice to serenade my second cup of tea.
I’ll gladly take all the miserably hot sweaty days I can get if it means summer can last just a little while longer this year. Sweater weather? What’s the rush?
I know there are some of you reading this thinking I must have lost.my.mind. because you are counting down the days until school starts again. Sister, I have been there! In all honesty, I was there last year. But everything is so different this year. You see, this year, when the inevitable first day of school rolls around, my oldest will leave for college and my baby will start high school and I am simply not ready for either of those things.
College orientation was a success, although I still don’t understand how I was the only mother to cry. He’s picked his classes, he’s found his dorm. He’s been collecting towels, bedding, and laundry supplies for weeks now, even though I insist he shove them in the back of the closet out of sight. He might be ready. I am not.
The youngest has completed driver’s ed class. I’ve even driven with her. She’s started wearing make-up and spending way more time with friends than with mom. She went to sleep one night a sweet little cherub and woke up the next morning fully grown. That’s enough change for me, thankyouverymuch. I don’t need a change of season. I do not need back-to-school!
I know I can’t hold back the hands of time forever. I also know I will in all likelihood cry until I can’t breathe at certain future dates in August. I’ve known since the very first minute that I held my babies in my arms and looked into their eyes that this is how it would go. It doesn’t make this change of season easier.
So please, let me live in denial for a little while longer. I hear fall is coming whether I like it or not. But not today. Around here, it is still summer.