Being a mom, I’ve accepted that it’s okay if my life doesn’t go according to everyone else’s pictures on Instagram. Sometimes, you just have to go with the flow and break tradition. In the end, we’re the ones who are putting that pressure on ourselves, especially when it comes to special events and holidays!
This all came full circle for me last Halloween. Can you guess what my daughter chose to be?
A girl in a black dress.
I know, clever, right? The vampire teeth I bought her? She didn’t want to wear them. The purple wig she had to have? Too itchy. The vampire collar with coordinating choker necklace? Too tight. “Okay. Can I at least put some makeup on you?” I begged. Nope! At this point, I had a decision to make. I could cling to tradition and play a little hardball, or I could take the high road.
Truth is, my daughter wasn’t really interested in dressing up or going trick-or-treating that night. We had just moved into our new house, and she was enjoying putting away her things in her new little space.
I knew our Halloween time together was limited; my ex and I shared the time with her every year. One little voice inside me said, “C’mon, she doesn’t have that many Halloweens as a kid, make her go out and enjoy it—all the OTHER kids are!” But the other voice inside me said, “You know what, Halloween is a day for kids to enjoy and right now, she’s enjoying getting acquainted with her new room. She can trick-or-treat with her dad, later.”
So that’s how my daughter spent her Halloween with me this year. In her room, wearing one quarter of her costume, putting away her books and her Barbies.
She was happy. I was happy.
Later, when she went trick-or-treating with her dad, I wondered what people would think about this kid, who at first glance wasn’t dressed up. (Okay, the black dress was kind of creepy—it came with the vampire kit).
But you know what? I really didn’t care. I knew I made the right decision that night. As moms, it’s natural to do what we think we should or what is customary—but it’s refreshing to break the rules every once in a while when it feels right.