I may not be a true expert in anything mom/parenting related, but there is one thing I know pretty well: big babies. I’ve lived, learned and adapted to oversized babies over the last four years. My boys both weighed in at 9 pounds 10 ounces at birth, which is just big enough to get big baby status in my book. I love every generous, fleshly, squishy, cuddly, chunky Michelin baby roll. It doesn’t last forever. But, here are nine things mommas of big babies should know:
- You’ll get great at your canned answers to frequent, and some TMI, questions. Yes, my delivery was natural. Hell yes, I had drugs. Yes, everything’s fine “down there;” I had a great doc who was pretty handy with a needle and thread. No, both my husband and I were average sized babies and now we’re average sized adults. Yes, I have stretch marks. No, I didn’t have gestational diabetes. No, they weren’t late, both thirty-nine week inductions actually. No, our pediatrician is not concerned. Yes, I breastfeed. Yes, I’m sure they’ll slow down eventually.
You’ll learn to hate the chart. I try not to get hung up on this one. I know (in theory) the chart exists to give medical professionals a reference point to ensure your child’s growth isn’t skewing too far in one direction or another as time goes on. But, in practice it’s an offense to everything I know about math. If I have the largest child in the world (which I don’t) he should be the one hundredth percentile. It doesn’t work like that. “Off the chart” is a phrase you’ll hear a lot, making the chart just one of those things you have to try to explain away to friends, family and strangers regularly.
- People will treat your child differently. For most children, size is a pretty reliable clue as to a child’s age and developmental milestones. But when your four-month-old looks 18 months old, grocery store clerks will judge them (and you) because they aren’t talking. Or a not so helpful parent at the park will tell you you’re spoiling your “toddler” by carrying them instead of letting them walk. Not a toddler, just a six-month-old large baby. In the long run it likely won’t cause lasting damage that their average sized peers get the cooing, baby talk treatment while your baby gets treated older, but sometimes it stings.
- They’ll grow out of gear before they’re ready. There are weight and size requirements on most baby items. Both my boys outgrew door way hung jumpers before they could solidly hold their heads up and ever enjoy them. Even if you fudge the weight limits, at a certain point things become unsafe. Baby swings and floor based jumpers will both start to rock and tip dangerously, depriving your child of months of unrealized fun. Be prepared to eventually go tray-less with your high chair. And, yes, some thighs simply don’t fit in a Bumbo (unless you have access to the jaws of life)
- You’ll have clothing struggles. Don’t get too attached to a size, because if you blink you’ll be in the next one. It’s tough on the budget to not be able to space out wardrobe purchases more. This is also a bummer if you’ve bought seasonal or holiday specific outfits in advance. My advice (that I struggle to follow) is to not buy ahead guessing future sizes, no matter how good the sale is. Unless you don’t mind fuzzy Christmas pajamas in June. You can invest in onesie extenders to buy you a couple more weeks, but they’ll mostly be high/bare on the thigh and you’ll miss weeks of wear from your next size up.
- People who try to buy your kids clothes will try and epically fail. Even if they ask for their size I assume they have a crisis at the rack. “I know she said 4T, but it looks so huge. Maybe she was joking? I’ll buy the 18 Month instead!” And, more clothing woes. Onesies are fantastic for newly mobile babies. It keeps the tummy tucked in while they learn to roll and crawl. Unfortunately, 24 Months is the largest size you’ll find in one piece play wear for boys. It’s a good thing a round baby belly is so cute, because it’ll be hanging out a lot until they’re bipedal. Additionally: if you have a large baby you’ll likely skip 2T clothes altogether. For most retailers a 2T is just a 24 Month size with a slightly narrower cut; they’re sized assuming no diaper and less baby fat. If you have a larger than average baby you should go straight from 24 Month to 3T.
- You will not get Kelly Ripa-esque biceps. If I had done a push up for every time someone said “carrying him must be a great workout,” I’d have truly enviable muscles. Instead the only thing I have is a sore back. Carrying a heavy child does not yield the same results as preforming technically focused bicep curls. And, those mommy and me workouts that combine bench pressing your baby and bonding? Beware! Most recommend you cease lifts and such when your child weight reaches fifteen pounds.
- Big babies aren’t necessarily easier. Someone started a rumor that big babies are more content and sleep through the night sooner because they need to eat less or less frequently. That has not been my experience. It takes a lot of fuel to keep a motor running. Big baby moms have the same concerns moms of average sized babies have. Have they regained the birth weight they lost? Are they eating enough? Moms are going to stress about that stuff regardless.
Bowl full of jelly? - It could be high quality breast milk, but probably not. While my boys were exclusively breast fed and maintained their large size, I’ve donated large amounts of breast milk to friends and through exchanges and no one has reported huge changes in their child’s size. Sometimes kids are just big.
Did you have a big baby? What did you struggle with based on their size? What surprised you?
Ginny, this is PERFECT!!! Alexander was 7lbs 11oz at birth… but he was THREE WEEKS EARLY. This entire post spoke to my mommy heart. The kid is 30lbs at 16 months and still growing. We’re about to skip to 3T. He grew out of his swing when he was WAY too young, etc, etc etc. Thank you for pointing out these things, because sometimes I wonder if I’m the only one that deals with this. I LOVE my gigantic baby and wouldn’t have it any other way! 🙂
I think my favorite are those knuckle dimples on the back of their hands. Too delicious!
My nearly four year is a bean pole now- but he skipped 4T, was in 5T for a minute and is now in 6s. How?? I can’t keep up or slow down time!
I LOVE this article!!! I laughed throughout it because every single thing you’ve said is SO true! My son was 11 lbs 4 oz when he was born, and they scheduled my section a week early. But, absolutely nothing was wrong with either of us. Just had a big baby! And, he’s still big! He is now 2, and in a 4T, sometimes 5T. And, people still talk to him and try to communicate with him like he’s 4! 😉
Isn’t that wild? I can’t keep up! My nearly 4yo is mostly is 6s. They’ll slow down eventually, right??
Yea big baby mamas!
I love this!! I’d add three: 1.) the infant car seat is not long for this world…we switched to a convertible seat at 4 months because he was 21 pounds and my back couldn’t take carrying it anymore. Plus he was beefing out of it and uncomfortable. 2.) same goes for the carrier. Im jealous of my friends who get to wear their baby for 1+ years. My back was bad to begin with so I couldn’t carry him for long, but even my husband’s back was giving him problems after long periods with the baby in the carrier after 6 months or so. We do a lot of hikes, and were so much happier once we got a hiking backpack. 3.) Be careful with the monthly diaper orders. He sometimes went up in size before we got through our monthly order! But there are a lot of upsides to a beefcake! One of which is that after flying through infant clothes sizes in a matter of weeks, he has now been wearing the same size for over a year because he hasn’t gained much weight, just keeps getting taller. And I miss his chunks!
That stinking car seat is so heavy. I think we made it to six months- completely back broken.
We left the hospital in size 2s, so I feel you on the diapers. I had filled the dresser with packs of newborns and bought 1s. Ha!
Pretty spot on. My first was 11 pounds induced at 38 weeks. Unfortunately, at a military hospital with no drugs as Desert Storm was happening so short on that stuff. But fortunately for me he slept from 1030pm to 6 am from day 1.
I am blown away! You’re super woman!!
YOU THINK YOU BABY IS BIG, let me leave you shocked, to make a long story short, my baby girl was born May 18, 2015 at a healthy 7pounds and 14 ounces, 21 inches long. She now weighs 48 pounds and is 32 inches long. Breastfeed baby, it very hard to get her to eat as I’m trying to ween her, eating only a few bites of food and day! She’s had numerous test and her doctors can’t find anything medical wrong with her, or an answer why she’s gotten so big!