Confession: I am a big English nerd. In middle school, diagramming sentences was like….my favorite. I know, nerdy, but ah well. I love grammar, definitions, quotes and all things “wordy”. Because February is the month of LOVE, in true English nerd fashion, I decided to research the different definitions of this word that is such a big part of our vocabulary. This definition of “love” stood out as my favorite:
“Love is the determination to meet the needs of someone else”.
Key word: determination.
This definition got me thinking of the day my husband and I said our “I do’s” and pledged our lives to one another. After our honeymoon came a tiny townhome we adored, several years of intense schooling, a dog we referred to as “our first child”, and then our precious baby boy. A few little additions, and all of a sudden, our lives looked completely different from the day we stood at the altar. So much goodness had been added and many trials had been overcome, but our lives no longer only revolved around each other.
In my personal motherhood journey, I’ve learned that being a mom means our plates are almost always full – they stay full. Whether you have one child or five children, we mamas are busy meeting “the many needs”…the needs of the little or big ones that rely on us for daily meals, clean clothes, help with homework, and keeping all their extracurriculars organized. We’re often so encompassed with meeting the needs of our child/children that we can unintentionally let our man slip down pretty low on our priority list without even realizing it! Because, life, girl…
I know I’ve personally found myself in the tunnel-vision of motherhood many-a-times….having that moment when you look back over months and realize you can’t remember the last time you shared a date night together. Sheesh. The truth is that I love and adore my husband so much more now than I did when we got married 11 years ago, BUT I’ve seen how life can have a tendency of getting in the way of my SHOWING him that love.
I’ve also learned that while big gestures might be more memorable, it’s the little, everyday actions that matter most. The simple yet intentional daily habits are the ones that make our marriage.
So, here is my challenge for all us mamas who are wanting to “up the ante” in giving your man a little more TLC! Below is a list of my favorite “little things” that can help us love our husbands well. Let’s commit to practicing ONE (just one!) of these ways EVERY day during the month of February. With a little extra effort, these simple daily habits can totally rock your man’s world!
- Compliment your husband on his appearance, his character, or something he did. Simple complements go such a long way!
- Sneak up and hug him from behind.
- Write him a note and stick it in his work bag for him to find later.
- When you’re away from one another, shoot him a fun text like, “I’m amazed by everything you do. You do good, babe.” Or, “Good morning, love. I’m missing you today!”
- Greet your spouse at the door. Stop what you’re doing in the kitchen, with the kids or at the computer. Get up, look him in the eye, and welcome him home.
- Make him a cup of tea or his favorite drink without him asking.
- Brag on him in public.
- Clear all of your distractions and ask him about his day.
- Cook his favorite meal just because.
- Give him a massage.
- If you use his car, wash it, fill it up, or clean it out.
- Touch his hand while walking or talking.
- Pray over him. You can pray with him or simply pray for him. Growing your spiritual connection is so incredibly rewarding.
- Show interest in one of his interests – a football game, his favorite TV show, or a hobby he likes.
- Plan a date night behind his back, and p.s. – it doesn’t have to be a production. Go for something simple. Go watch a local band perform, grab coffee and dessert at a bookstore, or share dinner at his favorite restaurant. Make arrangements for a sitter ahead of time, lay out his “date night” clothes and grab that new shade of lipstick you’ve been waiting to try!
- Shower him with affection but make sure that you go first. (Initiate girls, initiate!)
- Praise him for what he does.
- Drop a treat off at his workplace (coffee, lunch, or a homemade dessert).
- Dress up for him! It may not happen on a Tuesday night, but if you’re going out to dinner, throw a little flare in there. Rock some heels and dangly earrings, girl! Trust me that he’ll notice!